I need some black friends

October 6, 2006

I was cruising around the BET website looking for information about The Christies, the new reality show about Doug Christie & his lunatic wife, when I ran across the promo page for the new show Beef.  In a nutshell, “Beef: The Series explores the conflicts of America’s hottest celebrities every Wednesday at 9 p.m. (ET/PT)!”  I hate to sound like a complete provincial rube, but what the fuck, Black America? 

Are you really going to tune into a show about millionaires who have petty grudges against other millionaires?  Episode One’s synopsis makes me think this show was pitched to E! (Entertainment Television) and then rejected for not being highbrow enough for the discerning E! audience.   “In the first episode, Beef: The Series explores the catfight between Tyra Banks and Naomi Campbell, and gets into Lil’ Romeo and Bow Wow’s beef.”  There’s seriously an audience wanting to know about Tyra Bank’s opinion of Naomi Campbell?  Aren’t Lil Romeo & Bow Wow both 18?  Man, am I old.  And white.

I just wish E! would make a version of this for whitey.  “On the next episode of I’ve Got A Bone To Pick, Barbara Streisand – is she still angry at Bruce Willis for his caustic remarks about James Brolin?  Plus, inside the feud between Haley Joel Osment & Jonathan Lipnicki!”



  1. This sounds like the hip-hop version of one of those VH1 countdown shows, but without the “top 20” shtick. Immitation is the new creativity.

  2. Funny blog. Funny comment, mrkinsley. I’m so going to use that line, “Imitation is the new creativity” and pretend I thought of it.

  3. uhm… truth be told… i, a white woman who watches more television than one responsible adult should, actually do care about the ‘beef’ betwixt Tyra & Naomi. Addiction to celebrity gossip sees no color, nor is afraid to delve deep into the cable world. btw- what time is this airing again???

  4. Actually, the Banks/Campbell imbroglio is the most white friendly Beef they have. There’s a lot of gangsta Rap based disagreements (Jay-Z vs Nas, 50 Cent vs The Game, 50 Cent vs Ja Rule, Easy E vs Dre, etc), which is kind of a surprise considering the themes of peace & universal harmony that seem to be synonymous with that kind of music.

  5. “Funny comment, mrkinsley. I’m so going to use that line, “Imitation is the new creativity” and pretend I thought of it.”

    But if you claim that you thought of it, that would mean you weren’t being very creative under the new rules of creativity.

  6. “Addiction to celebrity gossip sees no color”

    Don’t fret. My black friends don’t get it either.

  7. […] During a break from the relentless non-stop torrent of work that was my recent NYC business trip, I decided to walk up to Harlem from the hotel I was staying at.  Never having been there, and having an aforementioned dearth of black friends, I would have been at a total loss as to how to find Harlem’s location (a notoriously closely guarded secret from Whitey), had it not been for the Shaft-era classic “Across 110th Street.”  Ah, crossover hits, you teach me everything I know about the urban experience. […]

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