I Don’t Want To Be Raped By A Bear

December 5, 2006

Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice… won’t get fooled again!!  Still, it IS a really nice house… and it IS free to enter…



  1. Oh, I think you do.

  2. You’ll be disappointed to know that when I googled “Bear Raped,” thinking of course that your blog would be the only thing to have such a random pairing of words, jonsonblog was nowhere to be found. In fact, there was a ton of ursine molestation going down. Personally, I liked it better when they just ate people.

  3. Yeah, but I was into it long before it was COOL to be into it.

  4. I’m gonna register so you might as well get raped by a bear because I’m a chick so I have a WAY better chance of winning (the bear, not the rape) than you.

  5. I have a WAY better chance of winning (the bear, not the rape

    Anna, I think you’re confused; the contest is for a House, not for a Bear. If the contest was for a bear, but the losers got raped by that bear, I’d probably enter EVERY year.

  6. No, no, no, no! You cannot enter. It took me a week to get you out of that crying funk because we didn’t win the last house.

  7. Dear Missus,

    While I understand your impulse to be the “voice of reason,” I will kindly ask you to stop. The rather random and unpredictable nature of the good Mr. jonson’s impulsiveness is the very wellspring of our on-line amusement. If this is a detriment to your state of marital bliss, I apologize. But do try to think of the thousands… mmm… hundreds… uuh… several of us who seek solace in living vicariously through your husband’s bathroom, business trip and on-line antics.

    The Junior Senator from Kinsleyville

  8. Oh, it’s hundreds. I mean, mostly looking for “sex with animals” and other related queries, but still.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: