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Delicious Tragedy

September 11, 2007

A couple co-workers & I were discussing the Flavor Shot shotgun ammunition that’s made from seasoning (instead of lead) so you can kill your prey & begin the marinating process in one step.  As a new parent (and a fan of delicious seasoned meats), it occurred to me that while it’s always sad when a gun owner’s child finds daddy’s gun & accidentally kills themself with it thinking that it’s a toy, it must be TWICE as sad if the gun is loaded with Flavor Shot. Because then not only do you have the whole dead offspring thanks to your own negligence, but you probably develop a pavlovian association between seasonings & tragedy such that you couldn’t enjoy Indian or Thai food anymore.

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8 comments

  1. Oh, the number of times each month that I think about taking the link from my blog to yours.


  2. Oops. Was supposed to say “taking down the link . . .”


  3. I expected that from you before you were a parent, but now just the potential that Karma is this huge force I would think would keep you from posting such things.

    Yet I know how proud you were of this posting.

    BTW, very cool invention. I might try it this weekend, it’s opening day for Teal!

    WOuld you like me to document the cleaning of dove for you in photos?


  4. Okay, I understand it’s wrong to mock tragedy & that Karma can bite you on the ass, but is this an actual tragedy we’re talking about here? I mean, has ANYONE in the history of time ACTUALLY been accidentally shot to death by flavor pellets? Debating what is or isn’t humorous is a lost cause, but I would argue that the inclusion of the “flavor shot” concept makes the idea fair subject for ridicule.


  5. Oh, and NO. I don’t need you to send me photos of your successful hunt.


  6. I can’t speak for Jonson, but I find the idea of refraining from distasteful jokes because of a fear of karma-tic consequences to be kinda’ ridiculous.

    It implies that someone or something in the Universe is eavesdropping on my conversations, judging whether my jokes have crossed a line, and then dispatching unseen minions to smite my loved ones with the fate about which I joked.

    Seems very Old Testament-y to me.


  7. Exactly, but if Karma has google alerts, then it wouldn’t have to eavesdrop.


  8. I think your Karma is just fine. I laughed.

    But I also had this immediate vision of a well-dressed couple sitting down to dinner at an expensive restaurant. The waiter approaches with the 3′ long pepper mill. Before he gets close to the table, the man rises, gallantly aims his shotgun at his date’s plate, and lets loose with two barrels of 12-gauge deliciousness.

    Let no man argue with my right to bear condiments.



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