Is Nothing Sacred?

October 30, 2008

As alert Jonsonblog readers will remember, I am a big fan of The Slanket, America’s first blanket with built in sleeves.  So you can imagine my shock & dismay when I ran across this website for “The Snuggie,” a cheap competitor with absolutely no innovations, a knockoff in every sense of the word.  This aggression will not stand.

Not only is the Slanket superior in every way, the core truth of the matter is, America doesn’t need TWO blankets with sleeves, each trying to corner the lazy, cold-armed videogamer market.  We have serious problems as a nation, we can’t focus on these bullshit distractions.  Eras of foolish prosperity, that’s when you can establish a competitive blanketsleeve marketplace.  We’re in a well documented economic holocaust.  Plus: Snuggie? Seriously? That’s the best you could come up with?  Slanket tells me everything I need to know.  Snuggie sounds like the fabric softener bear, or a euphamism a pedophile would engage in.

So, in summary: fuck off, Snuggie.  The window of opportunity on this market closed before you ever registered a url.


  1. Because of jonsonblog, last year, three people got Slankets for Christmas.

  2. That prolly doubled their sales alone.

  3. I could just wear a bathrobe backwards.

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