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Sears Layaway

November 14, 2008

This is my favorite spam of recent days. Layaway. Like in the pre-credit days. Amusingly, everything in my house was bought on reverse layaway, where I take the product home with me today and don’t pay anything for it for months or sometimes (in the case of my television) years later.

Layaway is, if I understand it correctly, “give us monthly payments and we’ll hold on to this item for you, and when you’ve paid it off, you can take it home”.

I love that Sears is selling this scheme like it’s a consumer benefit. “Keep Gifts Out of Sight!” You know, with the little cupcake approaching the inquisitive age, hiding her Christmas presents will be a problem. Maybe I will hide them at the toy store until Christmas!!

“Reserve the Best Before It’s Gone!” What era of product scarcity are these ads living in? I’m pretty sure that if the Samsung TV I’m looking at sells out before I buy it, that’s only because a better one has come along that costs less.

What’s next for this relentlessly optimistic harbinger of consumer hard times? A Pawn Shop? “Tired of stuff cluttering up your house?!? Turn that old guitar into HARD CASH!!”

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8 comments

  1. Dammit Jonson, don’t you own a Wii? That damn thing was harder to get a hold of than an epileptic hummingbird.


  2. Ah yes, the Nintendo Wii. That is the one consumer product where Layaway makes sense. If you really want one, but you don’t have $200 and you won’t have $200 by the time your first credit card payment comes due, the financially beneficial act would be to buy the Wii on Layaway. But since that’s the ONLY example I can think of, it should really be called Layawii.


  3. Check me out, biotch! Keeping on the topic!.

    I rock. (a little)


  4. WTF? How’d you get so prolific again after months of neglect.

    (Yes, that is too on topic)


  5. The Wii is as easy to acquire as a loaf of bread compared to the odyssey that is the Wii Fit.

    The credit markets are still frozen and our economy is heading for a depression, so I think you’ll find layaway becoming ever more common.

    On a humorous note, when a loaf of bread costs $100, people will even put food on layaway!


  6. Hm. I’m not sure “humorous” means what you think it means.


  7. I put the revival of layaway in the same category as the “gold kit.”


  8. Gold kit? Now THAT is humorous, I just bought some. Gold, I mean, not them gold coins or nuthin’.



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